Posted by Gandolfgrey on January 07, 19100 at 22:48:21:
In Reply to: looking for a title posted by Jeff on January 07, 19100 at 19:25:32:
Hi,
I really don't know what to say, but to acknowldge that I think you did fall in love with Andy, and that he loved you. Remember, two years in a boys life is a long time and I'll bet he remembers the quality time with you. Can you remember how the marshmallows tasted? Do you remember how the smoke for the campfire smelled? can you rememeber how you felt when you comforted him when he was scared? He remembers to I think. Take comfort in the fact that at least he has those good memories for his boyhood? Maybr the only good memories he has.
It amazes me sometimes how a mother, or father for that matter, can say some of the things they say concerning their children. A boy I got close to was from a single mother. He's the same age as when you got to know Andy. I can relate to how you feel about a mother neglecting her kids. In my yf's case it was a matter of his mother being very sick, unemployed, and in an abusive relationship with the guy she was living with. I didn't get to know them very well, but I got to know the boy, I'll call him Alex, very well. He's been moved away a long time now, but there ain't a day goes by that I don't think of him.
One day, while talking to his mom as she was dropping him off here, she casually mentioned that she wished she wouldn't have had him. It was a mistake and he's really a burden. After picking my jaw up off the floor, I said, "he's not a burden at all, we love his company." She looked at me like I was crazy, and thanked me for watching him! He's living a thousand miles away now and I still think about him, worry about him, worry about what he thought about me. But what I worry about the most is wondering if he's happy. I've heard he's doing well and that provides some comfort. As he gets older the chances of kids like him to end up in trouble like Andy has is greatly enhanced.
Hey, man, I'm sorry Andy is hurting; as you hurt for him. What's really hard is knowing that the 8 yo Andy is still inside the man's body and that he's hurting. I know that you would like to be there, to hold him close, to make the hurt go away, and that's it's probably tearing you apart, but take solace in the fact that when you had the chance, you loved him. That's more than what the other people in his life can say.
Gandolfgrey